إسأل Certified Psychotherapist الآن

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Certified Psychotherapist

الأسئلة المجابة 14449 | نسبة الرضا 97.5%

Marriage & Family Counseling

Hi, I just got married to a Kuwaiti guy. We had a...

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Hi, I just got married to a Kuwaiti guy. We had a struggle during 10 months to get marry outside of Kuwait, because I couldn’t get into Kuwait. We were on distance relationships for so long like 10 moths and only he came 5 -6 time to me for 3-4 days. I did not have chance to get to know the guy in real life, what we were having WhatsApp life even did not have calls( he could not handle calls for strange reasons to me) I agreed on it. So after real suffer and struggle, he were showing me a care and supported me financially only in our needs for the marriage goal. If need money for papers or stumps, and he still was supporting me with food money as well as he told me he gonna care of me I don’t have to work and he ask me to leave the work, it was strange for me and I still kept working but I did not tell him. During 10 months we had fight which was really so bad and sometimes he did not speak with me 2-3 days , I was always first who text after fight even if I wasn’t wrong in it. Well, we finally got the things fixed but Cz we had such strange fights to me and difficult time I was not happy to travel there, more then this we were breaking up 2-3 times but we were stopping each other. And the day when all troubles over I felt like if I will go there we won’t be happy Cz during this time we had hard time and I sacrifice a lot and even watch training in YouTube how to treat the man right and make him happy, I did everything how it was in the YouTube, and we had things fix only when I was apologizing and texting him first. I got visa and I went to Kuwait! We were happy only few days and even had fight !, untill we got medical pre marriage test results and we got officially married in the court even this day we went only to ask what we need for marriage Cz we wanted to marry next week but even marriage certificate we got unexpectedly the same day and we had to find some whiteness. We back home the next day I was already sleeping in his sister room, because we had a fight and then he locked The room. Then time between locking the room and me trying to go back after fight I left to the other room to cool down, then I heard click and I went to the room directly and found the door closed. I pushed the handle so he can see I was trying Enter , I stayed for 1 min and I left. I understand he doesn’t want me in the room. I was so hurtful. I was so confused what’s happening. The next day his sister brought him to me and he was laughing or smiling strange and I told him it’s not a joke. And I asked him why he Locked the room. He said the reason u won’t like it and I won’t tell u. I felt so bad. Then he told me that I could have call him or knock the door so he can open!!! I could not believe that the house he called OUR house I have to knock the room and beg him to open it. I understand if the time between locking it was at least an hour and fall asleep and forgot to open, then yes! But I came to the room immediately!and there is not way he did not listen my handle pushing! I will short from this moment, the next 20 days, we had a fight every 2nd day, then Every day! And it was horrible Cz he was screaming at me and breaking this around. He could not care that his mom was sleeep in other room he could scream with open for and then walking and closing door with such force I thought even the door can break! after 2-3 days of seen things like this I started feeling unsafe and I felt insecure. I did not know what to expect form him , specially when his sister told me what he is like this since long time and he was beating her!! I started being careful with him I did not want to have any sexual life with him. And I was so stress and he never apologize for this things, the next day like nothing happened. Well 30 days pass like hell for me and I had returned ticked to Emirates, Cz I was living there because . This return ticket we had to complete my family visa I had to go out from the country and come back. O was feeling something bad will happen and I was counting hours when will be my ticket back. And the last day before I had flight we had a fight.. provoked by him and he even managed to take the ring from my hand by fooling and then kicked me out from the house with word get the fuck out of my house Bitch! In front of his mom and sister!! I was so damaged and crushed I couldn’t believe what I see and what’s happening. We have difference in age he is 29 I’m 34

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إجابة الخبير: Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Certified Psychotherapist

الأسئلة المجابة 14449 | نسبة الرضا 97.9%

Dear Customer,            

Thanks for joining and trusting us, much appreciated!

 

We would like to inform you that what you mentioned indicates that your husband has a nervous personality and also indicates a significant imbalance in the relationship between you and to solve the problem you have to treat the causes of such imbalance, as your keenness to stabilize your marital life does not mean complacency in insulting and hurting your dignity, as well as not a wisdom to clash and make dispute between you raised.

You are highly advised to clarify your position by rejecting the method of violence and insult and you are keen to establish a stable family, but that requires the effort of both parties and not one party, and you can request the intervention of a wise person in his family to judge the matter.

Try to build a positive relationship with him and avoid the causes of nervousness to him or what may provoke his anger, change the routine of your life and make common interests between both of  you, and make sure to calm and stick to him when the dispute happens and withdraw if it indicates the escalation of the dispute.

Discover the key to his personality, each personality has a key, even the most difficult people in dealing with have a way to persuade and deal with, so treat him smartly to turn the rudder at your side, take care of using the good and positive words = and keen to show love and attention, it will inevitably change him.

If you have another question, feel free to ask us and we will answer with pleasure.

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Kind Regards,

إسأل Certified Psychotherapist

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Dr. Raedah Hamdy

Certified Psychotherapist

الأسئلة المجابة 14449 | نسبة الرضا 97.5%

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